Picture this, you’ve taken your partner ice skating to show off your moves and to woo them with your style.

There’s just one problem… You can’t skate.

No more than 5 seconds after entering the rink, you place your feet on the icy floor and fall straight onto your bony backside.

The pain. The Agony. The embarrassment.

Not only are you now on the floor, but you’ve paid £20 for your partner to be publicly humiliated, while you scramble to your feet only to fall again.

Ice skating is something that should be watched and only attempted by the superior breed of well-balanced athletes who have spent years falling on their a**e to get it right.

Not only is it expensive, but there’s always a line, because just like you, everyone wants to show off their jelly legs to the world. And even if there isn’t a line, you have to ask… why?

Not fun.

But seriously, you will spend 30-60 minutes stood in a queue, watching everyone else have a good time, before getting probably 15 minutes of ice skating joy (well not so much, but you get the point).

And then when you finally get into the rink, you better be warm because surprise surprise, it’s gonna be cold.

Like really cold.

And if you’re me, it’ll end up with your girlfriend telling all of her mate’s that you’re a wetty with no coordination whatsoever.

Trust me, it’s really not worth it. Just stay at home with a hot chocolate and watch Eddie the Eagle. He’s a perfect example of snow-based failure.