Ice Skating: A Christmas Death Trap

Picture this, you’ve taken your partner ice skating to show off your moves and to woo them with your style.

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There’s just one problem… You can’t skate.

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No more than 5 seconds after entering the rink, you place your feet on the icy floor and fall straight onto your bony backside.

The pain. The Agony. The embarrassment.

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Not only are you now on the floor, but you’ve paid £20 for your partner to be publicly humiliated, while you scramble to your feet only to fall again.

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Ice skating is something that should be watched and only attempted by the superior breed of well-balanced athletes who have spent years falling on their a**e to get it right.

Not only is it expensive, but there’s always a line, because just like you, everyone wants to show off their jelly legs to the world. And even if there isn’t a line, you have to ask… why?

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Not fun.

But seriously, you will spend 30-60 minutes stood in a queue, watching everyone else have a good time, before getting probably 15 minutes of ice skating joy (well not so much, but you get the point).

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And then when you finally get into the rink, you better be warm because surprise surprise, it’s gonna be cold.

Like really cold.

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And if you’re me, it’ll end up with your girlfriend telling all of her mate’s that you’re a wetty with no coordination whatsoever.

Trust me, it’s really not worth it. Just stay at home with a hot chocolate and watch Eddie the Eagle. He’s a perfect example of snow-based failure.

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